Dr. B. doesn’t like the term “shrink,” he likes “expander.” I filled out more of the questionnaire, but I haven’t finished it. I’m very dehydrated I think. Nervous and tetchy. Stomach wobbly. I don’t know if I’m going to like going there, and as usual, I don’t know how much I can get accomplished in 45 minutes. $130. Jesus that’s a lot. At least it’s a lot for once a week. All I want to do is go shopping for yarn, too. Denial, I guess.
G wants to go look at the Vermont Castings grill at Fireglow. I bet you do, I told him, half-jokingly. The thing is like $1700. It’s gorgeous, and we’d never have to buy another one. I think they’re warrantied for about forever. It’d match the house, too. Like that was ever a concern for me, I was always about fitting my liking. I used to make fun of those people. Now I am one of those people. Yeesh.
I have to totally stop working on my newest sock and work on my sister C’s baby blanket. Her baby shower is next Saturday, the 5th. Yipe! I’m just not happy knitting with farn (Fake yARN). Although it is a wool/acrylic blend, it’s the acrylic that’s got me hot and bothered. It just isn’t draping right. Maybe it’s the basketweave stitch that’s making it lie funny. It might also be that we don’t get along all that well. I do NOT want to knit bad feelings into this blanket I so do NOT.
I stopped taking the Abilify altogether. I’ve still got the akathisia in my right leg and it’s damn annoying. Hopefully, it isn’t permanent. I’m still taking the Wellbutrin, a fiber pill, and a multivitamin.
UPDATE: 6:48 pm
The session with Dr. B. was good for a first session anyway. I feel like he understands me. I feel listened to, that no matter what I say he will listen and be interested. He said he’d adjust his fee to help out, which I think is very cool. I’m going to also see if my dad is willing to help out, although he probably won’t be. Even though all this crap is their fault at the base of it. I still have the rest of the questionnaire to fill out.
Pop-Pop’s Mystery Lotto came through again with another little bundle for us, so that’s a little tiny weight off my back. The IRS cashed our checks so we’re back down to not much in the bank, although if I’m right, today is payday. Just checked and yes, it is, although I am making like no fucking money for what I work.
I’m still hungry, even though I had two hot dogs for lunch at 3:30 or so. Crackers? What to do for dinner, what to do…there is some sweet sausage and sauce in the fridge, and I can make tortellini (yum! just butter for me, thanks) (I love how you can see the steam coming off the food). Yeah, I think that’ll do it. Then some Sopranos with dinner, a VitaminWater, a little knitting before bed. Found a nursery that has a cherry tree the right size and for a good price on the way home from Dr. B’s. We’ll go see it tomorrow.
And maybe, the grill. We can dream, can’t we?
Tonight was our Thanksgiving redux, replete with grilled turkey, stuffing, gravy, mashed potatoes with cheese and sausage, pumpkin soup, and pumpkin bread. Everything except the bread (which I baked) was made from scratch. I can’t say enough about the stuffing. I’m a stuffing fiend, going so far as eating StoveTop for dinner, plain, when I was single. I’m lucky enough to have a husband who really puts everything he has into the dishes he cooks. You can taste the love with every bite. Joining us at our groaning table were our friends Josh and Tony, my sister, Carolynn, her husband, Tom, and their son, my adorable nephew, Zeke (in case you forgot what he looks like, here he is).
